Crazy Frog Canonically Died Of Swine Flu In 2009

Read to the end for a deeply chaotic stim video

First, A Cool Cement Idea

The following four frames come from a 5-Minute Crafts video (the same Facebook page responsible for the egg that gets bigger than before). This video is titled, “Cool cement ideas you can make at home 🍁” and it was sent to me by my friend Cates. The leaf emoji in the title makes me think that whoever made this video believes this is something that’s perfect for fall. Cool. Let’s dive in!

Wait for it…

Hell yeah. Absolutely perfect. Thank you 5-Minute Crafts.

Next Up, A Great Moment In Being Horny On Main

Alright, A Cool Joker Video (Just For Boys Though)

I’ll be honest. I’m not really sure what’s going on here. It’s called “15 Epic Boys Jokers (Joker’s Ultimate Quotes)” and it seems like it was created by a bot maybe? I don’t think it’s satire?

The channel that uploaded it is called Quotes Uploader. The channel has posted about 26 videos in the last 3 months and, from a quick scan, it looks like only two of them are not Joker-related? Anyways, check out these quote Joker quotes:

Dude, the Joker is so twisted. BTW my extremely quick Joker review: He doesn’t play Fortnite once in the whole movie. Pretty lame.

Speaking Of Clowns…

So, I came across this guardian article from 2017 recently. It’s a trend piece about whether or not the first IT movie was going to make children more scared of clowns. Two years later, of course, we know that the main effect of IT vol. 1 was that a bunch of adults just got super horny for clowns. Which, I think, is worse.

The piece has maybe the most bad ass quote ever from a professional clown. I want to meet this man.

“A load of the folks who say ‘this is terrible for the industry’ have been clowning for about five minutes – they’ve not been through this before,” says Ian Williams, honorary secretary of Clowns International, which claims to be the world’s oldest clown organisation. “It’s not going to kill off clowning. [The TV miniseries adaptation of It, starring Tim Curry] came out 27 years ago. I was clowning then, I’m still clowning now.”

“I was clowning then, I’m still clowning now.” Wow evergreen tweet.

So, Did You Know Crazy Frog Died?

Thanks to a Tumblr post I came across recently, I discovered two things:

  1. There appears to be some kind of Crazy Frog canon.

  2. And according to the Crazy Frog canon, he died of swine flu in 2009.

Per Crazy Frog’s Wikipedia entry:

In 2009, it was reported on the Crazy Frog Twitter account that the character had supposedly contracted swine flu. The next creditable tweet is the character stating "I WANT TO GO TO PARIS". After his final tweet on 22nd June 2009, Crazy Frog has not been active, implying he died in Paris in the summer of 2009. No uploads have been featured on the official YouTube page since this date also.

Pretty crazy. RIP king. Absolute ringtone legend. Another funny Crazy Frog fact I discovered via his Wikipedia page, apparently Crazy Frog’s creator, Erik Wernquist, was always pretty upset about the name.

“"If I had known that this was going to be such a big thing I would not have allowed them to use that stupid name,” Wernquist once said in an interview. “It has nothing to do with the character. It's not a frog and it's not particularly crazy either."

OK, What Is Happening With The Kamala Harris Fandom?

These two tweets contain so much raw cursed energy that looking directly at them feels like that geiger counter roof scene from Chernobyl. Let’s go through this very slowly, alright? First, I did not know that Kamala Harris has stans. Second, I didn’t not know that they were called the #KHive. Third, I did not know that this is what a typical day inside the #KHive was like. I took a quick scan of the hashtag and, for the most part, it actually seems pretty tame. And yet…

Before You Go, Has Anyone Seen This Train?

According to kyra-writes, a Sonic Sluts train car was spotted in Poughkeepsie, New York, in March. If anyone of you have seen this train, please send me pics. Thank you.

Finally, Let’s Talk About Belle Delphine Again

Remember Belle Delphine? The British E-Girl who started a SFW Pornhub account, sold her own bath water, and was eventually banned from Instagram most likely for pornography. Well, she’s been off the grid for a bit. Her first Twitter account went down after she tweeted a photo of herself in a fridge and was then attacked by PewDiePie fans and—

God this is just. What am I doing with my life? What even is any of this? It’s just fucking gibberish.

Anyways. Sorry. Right, So Delphine has a new Twitter account and recently posted a photo of what she claims is her mugshot.

In a subsequent tweet, Delphine claims that a girl came to a party she was throwing and stole her hamster. In retaliation, Delphine says she spray painted a clown world Pepe on the girl’s car and was then arrested. She says she did get her hamster back. The plot thickens, however!

The Met Police said they don’t recognize the watermark on her photo. This is interesting actually. I’ve had to deal with the UK police a bunch for stories and they’re really not forthcoming at all. So the fact that they’re saying anything about this at all is a surprise. The dude above posting the DMs is an ex-DramaAlert news team member, so I trust his take on it (more or less lol). Also, like, this newsletter is free. I refuse to do any actual journalism for this.

Wow, to think, we almost didn’t know any of this before this newsletter started. What a wild ride.

P.S. here’s a deeply chaotic stim video.


***All typos in this letter are on purpose actually***